“How can you ever worry when you have seen your soul – your strength, your beauty, your golden wings. Jump into the abyss and you will fly.” - Deepak Chopra.

I came across this tweet on Twitter today. It is a basic concept that I have embodied with heart and soul for many years now, however the way Mr. Copra phrased it on this day has struck me particularly hard because of how it is worded in a manner that paralleled a dream I had the night before last.

It was a very intense and clear dream. I was the passenger in a car driving on a beautiful, scenic and windy road. The driver was not recognizable to me in my consciousness, but I know she was a friend. In the back seat, my son was strapped into his carseat content and happy. We came around the corner to an amazing landscape of stark white snow and a wide open lake lay below the cliff in front of us, completely frozen over. Everything was icy-white with underlying tones of earth-brown. We were in awe and the driver said, “See, isn’t it beautiful?”. Just as I was about to agree, the road suddenly ended and we were catapulted off the cliff, headed straight into the icy abyss below us. I was struck with this immediate knowing that we were not going to survive. I right away had the thought that I needed to use my spiritual tools, most importantly energetically grounding myself and my son. It was instantaneous, this surrender and knowing that everything as I had known it was about to completely be gone. The sense of calm that came over me as I acknowledged this was surreal.

I began the imaging around the grounding of our physical bodies as we were simultaneously crashing into the rocks below and quickly plummeting into the icy water. When we entered the water it began to have a golden glow. Then, all of a sudden we were rapidly being sucked into this beautiful golden light and it was as if we were speeding through a luminescent, multi-tone, golden tunnel – just like a high-speed tram. It kept occurring to me how amazing this was, and it wasn’t scary at all. I was excited to see what would happen next.

Next, I am on the shore of that same lake, a shift of seasons later because all the snow is gone and everything is mud-brown, like it often is in the spring as the winter snow starts to melt. I am accompanied by one of my close friends from college, and he and I are going to start searching the shores of the lake for the car and our bodies. He pointed me in the direction towards the cliff I remembered cascading down, and he set off in the other direction in case the wreckage had been carried downstream. I remember thinking how odd it was that I was searching for my own body, and the scene of where I had died.

As I began my quest I came across these giant machines digging into the hillside, scraping the cliffs away and completely changing the structure of the valley the lake was held within. The machines were having a hard time doing their tasks, as the landscape was very set into place. They were gyrating and getting stuck as they worked, but also relentless in their tasks – creating a terrible mess as they went. I quickly got into this state of panic that I would never be able to find myself (my old body) because if these huge machines couldn’t navigate their way and were just making things less and less recognizable, how in the world would I be able to get around – let alone find any parts of myself that might completely be buried or hidden underneath the water.

Wow, can you start to see all the millions of hidden meanings within this dream?

I remember finally coming to a resolve that it was okay, and that I didn’t need to find the old parts of myself. I wasn’t losing anything by letting go, and I knew that everything was perfect right there in that moment. I realized that it was perhaps a waste of energy to continue looking for those old pieces of myself. Ones which I had, actually, quite peacefully let go of when the time had come. I went to find my friend to tell him we could stop searching. I had everything I needed right there – my spirit was in tact, I was refreshed, happy and healthy.

During the dream I was trying to consciously figure out what had happened between the two scenes.  What I came to, was that it was as if I had woken up in this place vibrationally below where I had been – above on the cliff being an enlightened state, among loved ones, where I could see the beauty in all, and below being back in the physical world, with an old friend, and a bit of chaos that was causing some resistance and fear within me.  It had the thought that it was like I was returning (as I dived off the cliff above) to help others find skills, and new ways of seeing the world, that I had already learned about. I enthusiastically, and without fear, had come to help people navigate the new landscape that was quickly being changed by things much larger than us (in this case, the metaphor is the machines). I told my friend that I had lots of tools to help people do this.  Now fully aware of my “wings” and with a new sense of duty, I had an understanding and a certainty that I could stay (energetically/vibrationally) above what was happening around us, be in charge and help everyone through the changes.

My interpretation, in a nutshell: Things are about the change for me, in a very big way. It’s time to let go of everything as I know it. I no longer need to search for, or fear, old parts of myself. I have tools to move forward, and it is my time to reach further out into the world and empower people with self-healing abilities that will help them as the energetic, moral, and structural landscape of the world shifts. As I jump into that abyss, with calm certainty, I will undoubtedly take flight. And I can easily find calm within that awareness, and allow myself to take the leap.

Stay tuned for changes to come!

A regular practice in my life has been remembering to consciously breathe. Yea, yea I’ve never actually forgotten to take those simple breathes that supply oxygen to my cells – but doing it in a very intentional manner is one of those things that was actually shut down during my childhood.

When I was younger, I clearly remember some of the adults in my life taking big exhales during times of stress, and being the empathic child that I was I quickly absorbed all the “yuck” they were exhaling as if I were an extra absorbant sponge. As one might guess, it didn’t feel so good. I remember at one point making a conscious decision that I would try very hard never to make noise when I breathed so as not to affect others around me.

Fast forward 20 years and I quite frequently found myself feeling my body all locked up, headachy, stiff, unenergized, etc. It took me several years to realize part of why I felt so terrible was because my breaths had turned into shallow inhales, and only when absolutely neccessary. Eventually, I finally made the connection that the decision I had vividly made when I was a child, to take silent breaths, had turned into something so much more. I had completely pushed any consciousness out of the way I was feeding my body what it needs to support not only my cells, but also my spirits’ ability to connect into my physical being.

When I started my meditation practice and began taking classes at the Center I would frequently hear the teachers taking loud intentional breathes to incite the students to do the same. This was something I resisted, even then, sitting in meditation giving to no one other than myself. Once I began thinking about being a teacher I remember thinking “Yea, but I’m not going to take those loud breaths for everyone to hear, I just can’t do that!”

During my clairvoyant training our class was going to have a group breath session led by Juli Somers, and I was in so much resistance to it that I actually, unconsciously, manifested a 102 degree fever and had to miss class. Once I finally started to put things together I realized how much I dreaded allowing myself to release during intentional breaths, especially when there were others around, and I decided to schedule a breath session with Juli. This was an event that changed my life. These sessions, where one releases whatever they are holding at an unconcious level, via guided and intentional non-stop breathing for an hour, quickly became very addictive for me. I utilized this form of release throughout my pregnancy and am so thankful for how it helped me to move through things that I was working on during this time.

Even today, as I understand how important the breath is for the mind, body, spirit connection’s health, I still find myself holding on and resisting those glorious lung movements when things get frantic. So, daily I am trying to catch myself when I feel my chest contracting and take a pause to take a deep breath in and then loudly exhale.

Unlike when I was a child surrounded by those wise adults who knew that they needed to purposely breathe to work through their stress, but unwise in the knowledge that they were blowing it right into my path, I strive to breathe in an intentional manner. I utilize my energy awareness tools, to ensure that I am not expelling what I am releasing to those around me who might unknowingly absorb it, as I did when I was a child.

My intentional breathing has now become something that actually evokes delightful giggles from my son. Hooray for breaking old patterns! Ahhhhhh…..

It’s coming up on my own personal annual holiday, one that I lovingly call “Pull Your Head Out of Your Arse Day”. I decided to recognize this annual day several years ago when I was reflecting on the odd “coincidence” that I happen to of had two car accidents on the same date. The first was when I was in High School and the second one was 7 years later.

In retrospect, I can see they both occurred around times in my life where a major transition was about to occur – but I was wanting things to stay the same and completely ignoring the little signs that I was being given to nudge me in a new direction. So what did I get instead? A big-ole-whammy (of a car accident) that forced me to change; and the fact that I had two incidents where this happened on the exact same date is more than simply coincidence. Perhaps it’s even so that I could be here today, telling you about this holiday of mine.

I have become a big fan of noticing the coincidences that spring up in my life and using them as synchronistic signs to guide me. Hopefully, taking note of them before things get to the point of needing as big of a “wake-up call”, or what I like to think of as a push in a new direction, as a car-accident. The more we can recognize and act upon even the simplest of those “Wow, what are the ODDS?” incidents the more we begin to be in the natural flow of our lives.

Syncronistic signs can come in all shapes and sizes – anything from feeling particularly strapped for cash and receiving a free cup of coffee at your favorite morning shop to running into an old friend that you haven’t seen for years right in the middle of New York City. How we interpret and utilize the sign can totally vary depending on our state of awareness at that specific moment in time, and it is often times easy to completely miss them. However, the one thing that I do know it is that the Universe is designed to carry us along our path and no matter where we get hung up on a rock in the endless river of our source energy another little push or pull will be provided to help get us moving again.

Not too long ago, I was in a situation where I was going to be pushed in a direction that I wasn’t so sure was a good idea. I prayed to God for something to get me out of it, and minutes later I was presented with a pretty big “Are you kidding me?” kind of coincidence that could have been a very EASY out; however, I didn’t recognize it in that moment and I was instead agreeable to continuing on the path that I had been resisting. In retrospect, I found myself regretting that I didn’t notice the coincidence was in fact my sign from God as a way to alter the path. However, it doesn’t really matter which direction I chose at that moment because there are lessons to be learned from the course things are on now. I believe there will be more signs and forks in the road that will continue leading me on my path – in the same direction I’ve always been headed – back to aligning with myself.

I encourage you to dismiss the notion that there are any bad “accidents” cooky “coincidences” or “wrong” choices – everything happens for a reason. There is even a something behind why you are here, at this very moment, reading this article and newsletter. Something to ponder as you flow through this wonderful thing we call life.

When I was pregnant I not only expanded (and we’re talking some major stretching) in the physical sense, but also took immense steps in my spiritual growth.

Throughout my twenties I experienced tons of body aches, pains and illnesses. I often referred to myself as an 80-year old in a 25-year old body, and friends and family were always shocked with all my crazy diagnosis’. Occasionally, the thought of kids would come up, and my partner at the time would reflect that I couldn’t make it being pregnant because my body was so weak. And I believed him. It’s amazing to me, when I look back now, how I readily bought into this picture of lack in health, and how often times my spirit wasn’t in my body in order to deal with all the pain.

When I started to take steps down my current path, beginning to meditate and release untruths through my clairvoyant training, I went through some major shifts in my body as I let go of this false definition of myself. It wasn’t easy, let me tell you, but I slowly came to a place where I was feeling healthy and energized. I had just turned 30 and had a sense of freedom from my old self. Then, just as I was starting to understand that you get exactly what you need to go further in your healing, I found out I was pregnant.

Okay, here we go. The major test had arrived. Of course, old images of weakness and many fears around my body’s abilities popped up, but I was now certain in my power to define my path and let go of things that weren’t my truth. I could do this.

Since I seem to like challenges, I found myself with an opportunity to have an even more tremendous growth experience in that I was to be a single mom. So, not only were there old body pictures to release, but also an increased level of emotions to work through in the circumstances around being on my own.

My deep commitment to intuitive based meditation had me in a place where I was able to focus my mind into an awareness of what I was feeling, observe where it was coming from and then let it go – whether it be an emotion, lack of energy, a physical pain, or a tricky ego attachment. Not only was I able to release personal pictures about my health, but also all of the typical ideas one may hold about the discomforts associated with pregnancy. When I look back, I am amazed at what I was able rise above utilizing simple meditation techniques. My healing also opened me up to receive the love and support that was all around me. I was not alone, nor would I ever be.

I can now officially say that I had an extraordinary pregnancy – full of positive energy and healing. One in which I was able to be present, with spirit fully in the body, every moment. There is no doubt in my mind that this level of self-awareness and growth can be achieved by anyone who is pregnant – or not pregnant. The power of meditation is amazing.